During our time in Washington I was unable to find satisfactory answers to any of these issues from the church, local church leaders/members, or from family/friends.  It was a very dark and lonely time for me.  Eventually I noticed many other Mormons suffering in silence over these issues – in some cases leading to serious depression, addictions, marital distress, and even suicidality.  Ultimately I decided to leave my job at Microsoft, and to look for a way to help.  I honestly wanted to be a part of the solution — out of a sincere love for the Mormon people.

In 2005 I started Mormon Stories Podcast as a way to model open, honest discussion of difficult Mormon issues, and to provide a place for struggling Mormons to work through these concerns.  Although my early intention was also to help struggling Mormons remain active members of the church, I decided from the beginning that it would be important to interview people from all sides of the faith spectrum — apologists, believers, doubters, and even former Mormons.

2 Comments

  1. John Cellini June 29, 2014 at 10:04 pm - Reply

    John,

    I don’t know what to think of you. I have read many of your posts and listen with great interest to some of your podcasts. I have wondered, “What is this guy up to?” There is a niceness about you that is at once endearing and infuriating. I think you are working out some inner conflicts in a very public way that confuses people. It seems to me that you are a sincere and honest person trying to do the right thing. You’ll pay dearly for it!

    From my perspective, I hope that you will eventually overcome your conditioning and leave the limited world of Mormonism. The Mormon Church is a great social organization but, from a historical, scientific, and theological point of view, is an obvious fraud. I think you know that.

    There are two things I would like to suggest.

    First, please stop using the phrase “crisis of faith.” It rankles me. That phrase conditions people to believe that doubting or questioning one’s faith is a crisis. It’s not. It’s healthy to question. Doubting and questioning lead us toward the truth. Faith tethers us to the past. Please find a more positive phrase.

    Second, have you read Self-Reliance by Emerson. If you haven’t, please try to find some time to read it carefully. If you have read it but it’s been a while, please read it again. It’s far more inspirational than the Mormon scriptures and, with what you’re going through, will be uplifting.

    Best wishes,

    John Cellini

  2. […] concerns about the church, its history, and its leadership.  I also attempted to explain to him my motivations for Mormon Stories podcast.  During this first meeting President King made it clear to us that he hoped to act […]

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