Marriage, Family, & Sex therapist, Natasha Helfer, hosts this special edition of Mormon Stories Podcast with John & Margi Dehlin, as they discuss the aftermath of Natasha’s trial for apostasy and excommunication from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.
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A wonderful interview – Natasha has conducted herself in a most admirable way… Very professional and so very kind to those who have brought so much pain to her and the community she has served. It is a sad commentary on the LDS organization that they fail to recognize the immense professional value that she brought to those church members she has helped. Excommunication is a violent spiritual rape and should be stopped !! There is no place for this in 2021!!
Although I am not LDS, my husband was of pioneer stock and I appreciate how hard he struggled to accept his church while decrying many of its positions and actions. Sadly his recourse was to resign which brought shame from his church community and shunning by his family. As a result, it is impossible for me to see this as a ‘family centered’ church that is loving and inclusive. The LDS operation needs drastic reform so that the pain that families’ endure can be stopped. My hope is that Natasha achieves her goal of encouraging these important conversations to take place. Thank you John and Margi for hosting this wonderful podcast!!! Sending loving thoughts to Natasha that she finds peace and comfort after this unfortunate church encounter.
Thank you, Natasha, and John and Margi, for being willing to discuss this so soon after it happened and when you are still hurting. Best wishes for a better future for both you and the Church. I am of the opinion that the Church as an institution needs to repent, just as they expect their members to do.
I’ve been reading the Church handbook chapter about membership withdrawals, and I find little similarity between what is supposed to happen according to the handbook, and what happened in your case.
One other thing comes to mind: We covenant in the temple to refrain from “evil speaking of the Lord’s anointed.” Somewhere along the line, I think that someone has lost track of the difference between “evil speaking” and “constructive criticism.”
Thanks for all that you do, all of you.
EDiL13
(Elohim’s Daughter in Law)
I love listening to Margi as well as John. She is intuitive and genuine. Smart Lady and I would love to hear more of her insight on the podcast. And thank You Natasha for the work that you did and do. Without your ‘official’ connection to the church, any work on the LGBTQ youth is so valuable as you know. Shining another light on the tragedy caused by the shame from the church is never too much. Thank You guys!
Let me just say this was incredible and wonderful thank you Natasha John snd Margi we are all along the journey of learning the truth
Two things I wanted to address:
1 Natasha you are at a point in your life where you do not want to see the church as a cult. ( you gave a little lecture on it) I can tell you that John and the rest of us were probably at the same place you are right now!! It’s hard to imagine that the church could fall into that category
I have seen John slowly through the years come to the realization through study interviews and insights that he does see the cult aspects of the church
The book he suggested you read is very much an eye-opener. Please read it. If you continue to not want to call the church a cult that is perfectly your right to do that—— but I can guess that along the road ahead you will come to the realization that we all have…… as painful as it is
Until then we respect your right to your personal opinion
2 Natasha you have nothing to apologize for or regret about the excommunication experience or the aftermath — or the way you handled it
your response was that an abused and hurt person by a brutal and cruel procedure . it was completely normal that you would feel so crazy and heartbroken . From what I’ve heard everyone who has gone through that experience has felt a similar emotional devastation
The depth of your sorrow and pain is merely an indication of how the church hurt you and how terrible it is. it’s no reflection or judgment on your response. Under the circumstances it was completely normal to respond that way. It is cruel and you are a sensitive caring person
Don apologize or regret your emotional response. Take it as a sign of how terrible the experience was—- and is for others as well
When a loved one dies—we react emotionally at the loss. This is very similar
Your emotions are normal
What do you three think? Please respond
Wear the excommunication like a badge of honor. Have you heard of or seen the movie “Get Out!? You Got Out! You were in something that was not healthy or positive or life-enhancing. Embrace your new life and be well.